Unlocking Your Child's Day: 10 Questions to Spark Meaningful Conversations About School

As a parent, one of the most common questions we ask our children at the end of the school day is, “What did you do at school today?” However, more often than not, the response we get is a simple “nothing.” As frustrating as it can be, this typical answer is very common, especially among young children. So, why do kids often answer this way, and what can you do to get a better sense of what happened during their day?

Why Do Young Children Answer "Nothing"?

Young children, especially in the early years of their education, might not have developed the skills to fully articulate their day. For many, the concept of summarizing a day’s worth of activities is overwhelming. They may not know where to start, or they might simply be processing everything that happened and don’t have the words to describe it. Additionally, children can sometimes feel that their day at school was just "normal," and they may not realize that there’s a difference between "nothing" and the meaningful activities they participated in.

Another reason children might answer “nothing” is that they might feel the question is too broad or open-ended. Young children often need more specific prompts to help them reflect on and communicate their experiences. The more detailed the question, the more likely they are to open up and share.

How Can Parents Ask More Effective Questions?

Instead of asking, “What did you do at school today?” try using questions or prompts that encourage your child to think back to specific parts of their day. Here are some helpful questions to ask:

1. "Tell me something new you learned today."

This prompt encourages your child to focus on a specific moment of learning, whether it’s something academic or a new skill. Montessori environments focus on hands-on experiences and exploration, so the answer could be related to practical life skills, language, math, or nature studies.

2. "What was the best part of your day?"

This question helps your child reflect on the positive moments of their day. It could be about a fun activity, a special project, or even a meaningful interaction with a classmate or teacher. This question can help steer the conversation toward the highlights of their experience.

3. "Who did you play with today?"

Children often learn and connect through play, so asking about friends and social interactions can give you insight into their relationships and how they’re navigating the classroom community. You might hear about collaborative activities, shared games, or even conflicts that they’ve resolved.

4. "What did you do in the [specific area of the classroom] today?"

If your child’s school follows a Montessori approach, this question can help focus on the different learning areas, like Practical Life, Sensorial, or Math. By naming a specific area, you’re guiding your child to reflect on particular learning moments. For example, “What did you work on in the art area today?”

5. "What did you help someone with today?"

Montessori education emphasizes collaboration and kindness. Asking about helping others encourages your child to think about how they interact with their peers and what positive actions they contributed to the classroom environment.

6. "Can you show me something you made today?"

This is a great way to encourage your child to share physical items or projects from their day. Whether it’s a drawing, a block structure, or a simple craft, asking them to show and tell what they created can lead to more detailed conversations about their learning and creativity.

7. "What was the most interesting thing you saw or did today?"

This question invites your child to reflect on moments of curiosity or excitement. Montessori classrooms often encourage exploration of the natural world, so this could lead to insights about discoveries made during outdoor time or sensory activities.

8. "What’s something you felt proud of today?"

This question helps your child connect to their emotional experience and encourages them to recognize their accomplishments. It could be a moment of personal growth, like mastering a new task, helping a friend, or completing a challenging activity.

9. "Was there something tricky for you today?"

By asking about challenges, you help your child feel comfortable discussing things they might have found difficult or frustrating. This can give you a better understanding of areas where they may need extra support or encouragement.

10. "How did you feel when..."

Use this prompt to explore your child’s emotions. For example, “How did you feel when you finished your work?” or “How did you feel when you saw your friend at school?” Montessori education values emotional awareness and self-expression, so asking about feelings can help children connect with their emotions.

Why These Prompts Work

These prompts are more specific than the broad question, “What did you do today?” and give children the tools to reflect on and share their experiences. By providing a clear structure for their answers, you’ll find that they’re more likely to recall and communicate meaningful aspects of their day.

Additionally, these questions align well with the Montessori philosophy, which emphasizes independent thought, exploration, and reflection. The goal is to give children a safe and supportive space to process their learning and emotions, which strengthens the parent-child connection and encourages positive communication.

While “nothing” is a common response when you ask your child about their day, it doesn’t mean that nothing of value happened. By using specific prompts and asking open-ended questions, you can help your child articulate their experiences, reflect on their learning, and share their emotional journey. This not only helps you stay connected to your child’s world but also encourages them to develop a greater understanding of their own thoughts and feelings.